Mental illness and relationships

My top 2 main wants in a relationship are sexual attraction and nurturing.

I think most people understand the need to feel attracted to your partner. But when I say that I “want to be taken care of”, or nurtured, I get a lot of push back.

As women, we’re taught to be independent. We don’t need no man! And I’m fine with that. After my divorce, I’ve been single for 8 years and happy.

But whenever I am dating a man, I like for him to do traditional gentlemen things. Be romantic. Show concern for me. Help me with things. I don’t expect money. Would be nice but no.

And I would take care of him too. I love doing that! Nurturing.

Mental people tend to have more divorces, more relationship problems with partners, family, coworkers, etc. Is my desire to be nurtured a symptom of my illness?

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6 thoughts on “Mental illness and relationships

  1. Everyone needs to be taken care of, that is when we feel connected. I think if you can’t show your vulnerable site in a relationship (like asking for help when needed) and you can’t be nurtured (someone who accept your question for help), the relationship can’t florish. Don’t we connect through fun and less fun times? And when you feel nurtured in a relationship, you can take care of your partner. It is not a one way street. Maybe people think too much in terms of material things when they hear ‘I want to be taken care of’. But being provided with all the material things you ‘need’ won’t make a relationship last. Good topic!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oops, clicked following by accident, hence the weird unfollow then follow.

    I think nurturing is a very good thing in a relationship. I’d say it’s problematic to become so dependent on a partner that you’re no longer capable of doing things on, but if there’s no mutual support and nurturing what’s the point of a relationship?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Nurturing is part of any healthy relationship! So long as you don’t become codependent I think it’s reasonable to need nurturing.

    Have you read the 5 love languages? This book might give you some clarity on your own and others needs.

    Liked by 1 person

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